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Shockabuku Alecto

Time lapse here. It's a few years later. Majestyc, (Page's little girl) is 18 now. They call her Jest for short...or the "flamethrower". She's friends with Mordrid and lives in hell with him. It's very fitting since she can control fire, and all. Lucas and Kitty have been back together for a while and there is no sign of the vamp inside him. Wahoo. Sim got her old body back and Kit now has a new one as well. It's a mix of all her past lives.

Memories Gone By (this story is happening directly after Oni-Chan's It's Fate)

EEEEEEEESMASH Something squealed and crashed only a few feet away from where Kitty was relaxing.
"Shit!" she exclaimed as she rolled out of the way of the tree she was leaning against. It collapsed into the hood of a fallen…pod? Kitty rushed up to it and saw a dazed white haired woman climb dizzily from the wreckage.
"LEX!"
"Who…OW!" Kitty socked her in the jaw. "As if I'm not in enough pain all ready." Lex rubbed her sore jawbone.
"How DARE you come back to this planet!"
"Wha are you ta…" SMACK "Ouch! Will you STOP with the hitting?"
"Why the hell should I?!"
"What did I ever do to you?" In no time Kitty rattled off over a hundred things Lex had done that caused her agony. "Ok! OK! Enough all ready!"
"I've got plenty more," Kitty offered. "Come on, I'll tell you all of them on the way to the palace. The guys would like to see you."

"Hey guys!" Kitty called out. "Guess what the cat dragged in!" She swept Lex in front of her.
"DIE!" Sim lunged at the new arrival's throat. Shini grabbed the back of her collar.
"Who is that crazy lady?" Lex asked Kitty.
"Is she for real?" Oni frowned.
"I don't know what I did to you but I'm sorry. I hope we can be friends. You're very pretty."
"It's a ploy! Everyone! Hit the deck before she pulls out a semi automatic!" Lex looked hurt.
"I just apologized. What more do you want?"
"For you to leave."
"Why?" she teared up.
"Because you stole my powers you bitch!" Shini cut in.
"I did what?"
"You heard me."
"Now don't blame your inability to perform on me!"
"Guys!" Kitty interrupted the little...ok...giant spat. "She can't remember who she is."
"What?" everyone blurted at once.
"I think it's a trick!" Madi whipped out her silver desert eagle and aimed it for Lex's forehead. "I say we blow the bitch's brains out while we have the chance!"
"YES!" Sim and Shini cheered.
"No it's not!" Kit pushed the gun away.
"How can you be sure?"
"It's a gut feeling..." Kitty muttered after pondering for a while.
"Ok, I still think we should blow the bitch's brains out!" Madison aimed her gun again.
"Wait," Hatch pulled her arm down. "I think we should trust mom. Has her instincts ever been wrong before?"
"Ok, it's time you went OFF your medication flower boy!" Sim exclaimed. Madi began to put the weapon away anyhow. "Must I do EVERYTHING around here?" Sim asked taking it away. She shoved the nozzle to Lex's temple. Lex fell to her knees and swallowed.
"Oh shit. She's not foolin'" Sim gapped.
"Lex wouldn't kneel for anyone." Shini agreed.
"You would know." Kit winked at him.
"Huh. Kitty, you did not just crack a sexual joke with my husband." Sim growled. She was still a little untrusting after the incident in hell.
"Kitty the CONTROLLER!...er...where did that come from?"
"Hey, isn't that Lex's famous line?" Cael asked. He had walked into the room just in time to hear his sister say that. "And isn't THAT Lex?" He grew a concerned look, but it disintegrated quickly. "Odd, there's no dangerous force about her at all. Did she convert or something?"
"Can't argue with him. He's like, experienced with this kind of thing." Hatch pointed out.
"Okay. So we've established that's this isn't a trick. Now what." Madi crossed her arms and leaned against the wall.
"We make her good," Kitty grinned. "The whole time Lex has been after me she's done everything she can to make me evil." The grin grew wicked. "I want her to know what it feels like."
"Uh...she isn't going to transform again is she?" Sim took a step behind Shini.
"I think she's planning something worse..." Hatch answered her.
"What the hell is SHE doing here?!" Lucas yelled. He scowled at her seeing she was still at her knees. "Where's that henchman double of mine that is always doing your every bidding? Warming up the nukes?"
"I don't know WHAT you're talking about!" Lex whined loudly. "Just don't kill me PLEASE!"
"For heaven's sake. I'm not going to kill you." Sim gave the gun back to Madi.
"Eh? That's not Lex...is it?"
"Yes it is. She lost her memory." Kitty told him.
"A trick I'm sure."
"WHY DOES EVERYONE THINK I'M DECIEVING THEM! DAMN IT! IF I WAS THIS LEX PERSON I WOULD HAVE KILLED YOU ALL BY NOW!" she sounded ready to cry.
"She remembers how to cuss." Hatch pointed out.
"What's all the commotion?" Jaga walked in and spotted Lex. "DIE!" he shouted diving at her much like Sim had. Shini caught his collar too. He held the sibling back with one hand, rolling his eyes.
"What did I do to him?" Lex looked up at Shini with moist eyes. His heart almost melted. Almost.
"YOU KILLED MY WIFE!" Jaga answered for him.
"Not another one!" Lex began to cry.
"It's okay! Don't cry." Sim comforted her by putting an arm around her shoulders and pulling her up off her knees.
Lex turned around and hugged Sim.
"Everyone is so mean! They all yell at me! I'm such a bad person! I'm sorry!"
"Don't hug me...please..." Sim tried to peel the once psycho off her, unsuccessfully.
"This is something I thought I'd never see." Shini spoke up
"Oh shut UP you sniveling little weakling!" Kitty snapped at Lex.
"Oh SHUT UP...hey. I was going to say that…" Sim replied.

"Do you really think Lex has changed?" Jaga asked his sister. They (along with others) were hanging out in the kitchen, watching Hatch prepare dinner.
"I'm not sure...I actually want to believe it...but even if she did they always turn evil again."
"What about Cael? He was evil, and now he's not." Hatch replied flipping the contents of the frying pan.
"Yeah, but he started out good." Sim sighed. That's when they heard Lex scream bloody murder.
"I didn't do it I swear!" Sim threw her hands up in the air.
Lex came running in as everyone stood. She clamped onto Sim again.
"This is getting old..."
"What's wrong?" Jaga asked, reaching for his dagger.
"It was horrible! It was awful! I've never seen anything like it!" she cried.
"It was me you ditz." Shini walked in.
"You know what he was doing?" Lex looked up at Sim.
"No. What?"
"I DON'T KNOW!"
"It's called 'urination'" Shini rolled his eyes. "I forgot to lock the bathroom door."
"You'd think she's never seen it before." Hatch snickered.
"I've never seen anything so big in my life." Lex was perplexed. Shinigami smiled. Sim smiled fondly, along with Madi. Lucas and Hatch looked sick.
"Aw you guys are just jealous," Jaga slapped Lucas' arm when he saw their faces.
"Don't touch me." Lucas warned.
"Like you have anything to be proud of." Hatch mumbled.
"I resent that remark."
"ENOUGH TALK ABOUT MR WINKY!" Kit interrupted their debate. "Or I'll have to cut it off." All the men winced.
Sim pushed her away from him.
"Whoa...that's harsh even for you Kit." Lucas sounded very worried. And his face showed it. "Are you ok?"
"I'm fine you little maggot! Don't speak unless you're spoken to."
"She scares me." Lex hid behind Shinigami.
Sim pushed her away from him.
"Cowardly waste of carbon..." Kitty sounded disgusted at Lex's reaction. "If you had your memory you would have agreed."
"I most certainly hope not. That's just plain cruel."
"You know, I think I liked her better when she was evil."

"Sex? What is that again?" Lex sat in a chair in front of Gelf HB.
He slapped himself on the forehead.
"Cursed pain electrode sensors."
"Huh?"
"Never mind."
"Dinner time!" Hatch's voice rang out.
"Okay, let's not repeat the trauma of lunch this time." Gelf offered his arm. Lex took it and he escorted her to the dinning room.
"Any progress?" Lucas asked hopefully.
"Why again do you want me to help her get her memory back?" he asked.
"Because it's turning my lover into a psychopathic bad-guy."
"What else is new?"
"You have to refer to her as your lover don't you?" Hatch stuck out his tongue.
"Yeah well, the result is that she keep 'accidentally' walking in on my lover!" Sim shouted. Shini turned red.
"Hello all," Kitty came in with her red hair let down and wearing all black. A colour she hadn't used in a while.
"Uh...hey..." Lucas sounded unsure. Kitty slapped Shini's butt as she walked by.
"Tender prime." she smirked.
"EW EW EW EW EW!" Lex chanted.
"DIE!" Sim jumped at Kitty.
"No it's okay." Shini stopped her "I feel like a sex toy. Worthless and dirty, even."
"You're sleeping on Jake's level tonight," she whispered in his ear.
"He'll try to cut my head off and call me a fag!"
"You should have thought about it beforehand."
"If that's a problem I can ALWAYS shape-shift into a man."
"NO!...That wont be necessary Kit...uh...thanks for the offer...I think..."
Lucas seemed to grow increasingly angry at the scene. He looked even madder than Sim...if that were even humanly possible.
"Fine!" He shouted, grabbing Sim and kissing her. "You two go screw! Sim and I'll be in the closet!"
Sim slapped him.
"I think NOT."
"Slut." Kitty hugged him.
"It worked!" Lucas thought with glee.
Lex shuddered at how Kitty was acting. No one else was too thrilled about it either.
"Let's just eat this meal it took me FIFTEEN HOURS TO PREPARE!" It was that little outburst everyone realized that Hatch didn't look so good himself.

"This is getting a little out of control!" Shini came barging into the living room, zipping his fly.
"Why? What happened?" Jaga asked curiously.
"When Lex was walking in on me it was flattering but HATCH is a different story."
"Then lock the door stupid." Madi quirped.
"Lesbian." he whispered to her and walked out.
"Look who made me one 'Stallion'!" She teased him with his...er old nickname. He flinched and slammed the door.
"Well, that was too much information." Gelf HB rubbed his temples wearily.
"SAY MY NAME BITCH!" they heard Kitty shout from the bedroom. Not too long after that Lucas came out breathing heavily as he slammed the door behind him.
"That woman is a psycho!" Lucas got out between breaths.
"What happened? Catch you with your pants down?" Madi asked while Shinigami walked back in.
"That isn't funny."
"I bet she did!" Sim smiled.
"And how would you know?"
"Shini yells the same thing."
"DID NOT WANT TO HEAR THAT!"
"Then you shouldn't have asked."
"EWWWWWWWW!" Lex cringed. Lucas just leaned against the door trying to ignore the shouts and threats on the other side.
"I don't get it, Kitty's not a rough...er...you know..." The group was surprised Jaga would know this.
"And HOW DO YOU KNOW THAT?!" Lucas yelled at him.
"My room is right next to yours. Thin walls, man."
"Dear god..."
"Twelve times..."Jaga said thoughtfully "You're an Olympic athlete."
Now Sim was the one chanting "ew".
"THE DISHES ARE ALIVE!" Hatch screeched. "AUUUUUUUUGH!" He ran through the room wearing nothing but his boxers...and they were on his head.
"Oh my god..." Sim quipped; though she wasn't talking about the fact he had shorts on his skull. Shini glared at her.
"Brother! Did you skip your medication?" Madison ripped her jacket off and wrapped out around his waist.
"No."
"Don't lie to me," Madison warned.
"He's not." Cael informed them. He always seemed to come in at just the right times.
"Then why..." Everyone looked at Lex.
"What? I didn't do it?"
Shini held on to Sim as she attempted to go after Hatch.
"No wonder he was a sex god..." she mumbled. Everyone gave her a disgusted look.
"Yeah, just think of what you've been missing," Kitty grinned. Lucas was out cold on the floor in front of her.
"You didn't want me to get together with him!" Sim objected, stepping over Lucas.
"I never said that."
"But you insinuated."
"What about me?" Shini asked.
"I need to go to bed...NOW!" Sim grabbed him and headed down the hall. He smiled.
"I'll join you!" Lex ran after them. Gelf HB grabbed her arm.
"Not that kinda bed, speedy." he told her.
"Then what kind is it?" He sighed in response.
"Sim can take care of it. We need to get some more work done."
"Damn. It would have been fun."
"You could say that..." Kitty snickered as Lucas groaned. She kicked him in the head again.

"Maybe if we give Kit amnesia then Lex will remember who she is." Lucas ranted. He, Tsvantoor, Jaga, Sim, and GelfHB were up late trying to figure out what to do.
Sim yawned and smiled happily.
Jaga turned green for a moment thinking of what she had to be happy about.
"I say we kill Kitty and just eliminate the whole Lex problem once and for all!" Tsvantoor spoke up.
"No way! Kitty is my friend!" Sim disagreed.
"You'd rather have Lex? She killed you Mom."
"So?" she shrugged.
"Sim's right, we can't kill Kitty." Lucas replied with a sigh. "She'll just come back."
"Point." Tsvan slammed his head into his arms.
"Well we HAVE to do SOMETHING." GelfHB declared.
"EEEEEEEE!" Lex squealed from the next room.
"What is it now?" Lucas got up. The rest fallowed suit.
"I'll bet she walked in on Shini again." Jaga smirked.
"What would he be doing in…Kitty's…bedroom…I'M GOING IN!" Sim yelled. The rest fallowed her.
They came in just in time to see Kitty backhand Lex into the wall. Time seemed to slow down as the white haired woman's head swished to one side and slammed into the barrier with so much impact it left a mark. Lex crumpled into the floor.
"Bitch…" Kitty muttered rubbing her sore hand.
"What happened?"
"This sniveling idiot came in here to make amends. HA! I showed her…then again…she WAS only trying to make friends…maybe I shouldn't have hit her…" They watched as Kitty began to regain her old self, which meant…
"Quick! Tie Lex up!" Jaga acknowledged, but it was too late. The born again con picked herself up and gave them all her famous superior smile.
"Ah, much better. I finally have all those dreadful Boy Scout thoughts out of my head." She looked at the group at the door, then at Kitty. "It seems that I now owe you one. Use it wisely." At that Lex snapped her fingers and was gone from sight.
"Well thank god that's over with." Sim snorted crossing her arms and leaning against the wall.
Fin/OWARI

Sibling Devotion

"Cael, are you ok?" Kitty wondered as she walked into the garden terrace.
"Leave me alone…" Cael grumbled.
"Ok, now I'm sure something is wrong. You never tell me to go away."
"I'm starting a new trend."
"Ouch. Sim's been teaching you again hasn't she?"
"No."
"Then where is all this hostility coming from?"
"I said leave me alone." He repeated brutally.
"NOT until you tell me the problem." Kitty equaled his ferocity. Caelestis sheathed his blade, grabbed his sister, and put the sharp cold steel to her neck.
"You wanna know? THIS IS THE PROBLEM! I've been reverting! Slowly for the past eighteen years I've been reverting. There, I told you. Now what are you going to do? Tell the others so they'll start to hate me like they do Lex? I wont let you!"
"And I thought I was the only person who had episodes." She gazed at the rapier for a brief moment before rolling her honey brown eyes. "Look, I wont tell the others. Furthermore, even if I did tell them, which I wont, no one can be hated more than Lex." Kitty said calmly.
"Ha! Like I'm going to believe you! I can't trust anyone anymore! Not even myself! I don't even know what the HELL I'm doing!"
"Yeah, but I do." Jaga hit him on the head so hard Cael was knocked out cold.
"I could have done that." Kitty stated rawly as she rubbed her neck a bit.
"What? No praise for saving your life? I'm hurt."
"You didn't save my life…" Kitty sighed and pecked Jaga's cheek. "Thanks anyway." She picked her brother up and draped his arm around her shoulder. "It was a nice effort. Could you get the door for me?"
"Yeah, whatever."
"Thanks."

"Cael? Our Cael? The same guy who until a month ago still couldn't get the grasp of building urination?" Sim replied.
"Yes, and I still wish you hadn't taught him that."
"I didn't teach him that, Irvine did…I just got to have the after effects when I tried to show him by example…" Sim still shuddered at that one. So did Lucas who was with them at the time.
"Why exactly did you become Irvine anyway?" he asked.
"It was his birthday." Sim shrugged. "May as well let him enjoy it."
"HEL-LO! Have we forgotten the psycho brother here?" Kitty grabbed their attention. She pointed to Cael who was tied down to a chair and mumbling curse words under his breath.
"Why would he change now?" Madi asked. "It's been eighteen years for god's sake."
"It doesn't matter how long it's been." Sim shook her head. "He would have been fine if he just hadn't gone back to hell to get Jasmine. He's probably been fighting this thing since."
"Or he's always been fighting…" Lucas put in.
"Poor, Cael…" Hatch felt sorry for the guy. At least he had help fighting off his insanity.
"Don't feel sorry for me! I don't want your pity!" Cael burst while he struggled at his bonds.
"You sure you tied that tight enough?" Oniko asked Madi, for Mage.
"Yeah, let's just hope he doesn't change on us."
"That would be bad." Sim rubbed her hand with nostalgia.
"Um…maybe we shouldn't have given him the idea…" Oniko swallowed. She said it for herself, but Mage was thinking the same thing.
"Crap."

"What's going on?" Kitty asked as she came to. She was bound to a bed.
"A mad man is taking over the castle, that and I have a really bad wedgie." Jaga squirmed. Kitty rolled her head to one side to see him shackled to the wall.
"That's nice, anything new?"
"No, not really."
"Ok, I'll get you down in just a second." Kitty slowly made her hand grow three sharp claws from her middle fingers. She used those to cut the rope that was holding her down.
"Bet that comes in handy." He replied when she got loose. She made the claws retract and her middle finger shaped itself into a key. Kit flipped him off before using it to unlock his shackles.
"Sim was right, you are Houdini reborn." He jumped/fell to the ground and rubbed his wrists.
"Whatever, let's just find my brother and snap him outta this." She sighed.

Cael had a good grip on Sim's arm. She couldn't get him off and it was starting to bruise.
"Let go! Nan-dayo omae-wa?!" She found herself yelling, "Who do you think you are?" in Japanese. Cael gave her a lewd smile. He had gone back to human form, but that didn't seem to decrease his enormous strength. Sim slapped him.
"I think I'm the most powerful person here." He spat yanking her behind him.
"You're not as powerful as Shini!"
"True, but I've taken care of him."

Kitty and Jaga checked each door looking for her brother.
"Yo, Kit. C'mere, you're gonna love this." Jaga whispered in her direction. Kitty went to the doorway and looked inside. Shinigami was chained to a wall, brutally beaten and almost dead.
"He should've stayed in hell." She whispered back going in to get him.
"What are you doing? I thought you hated Shini." Jaga was a bit confused as she unshackled the unconscious body.
"I do, but I'm the one who should get to kill him. Not Cael."
"So you're pretty sure he did this, huh?"
"Yeah…" Kitty looked solemn as she straightened the demon's body one the floor.
"I don't get it, how do you beat up a god?" Jaga scratched his head.
"I have no idea, but Cael certainly figured it out."
"You know what this means? He may be able to get that lime haired chick he keeps crying over back from Lucifer."
"If he hasn't all ready joined forces with him…" She rubbed her hands together to create friction. "Help me out here, will ya?" she changed the subject.
"What are you gonna do?"
"I'm going to heal him, I did it to Lucas before with Lis, I think I can do it again."
"Lis?"
"Long story short, she was an angel like Cael."
"A lucifer?"
"No. Look, she could do this then, and since I'm one of them, I should be able to do this now."
"Ok, have fun." Kit glared at him a moment and hovered her hands over Shini's chest. She then looked up at the ceiling.
"Let this work…" she prayed. She could feel a warm glow in her palms. She was too afraid to look because it may fade away, so she lowered her hands onto his chest. ZAP A jolt of energy passed through her body and into Shinigami's.
"Holy shit!" Jaga jumped back as he saw Shini jerk up fully healed. "It worked!"
"What worked?" Shinigami asked until he saw Kitty fall backwards. Her skin was pale and she looked a bit drained. "Did she just?"
"Yeah."
"Well I'll be damned…of course I would have just gone back to hell."
"Hey, look at it this way. Now you wont have to find another body." Jaga shrugged.
"True," then his memory slowly returned. "WHERE'S CAEL, THE LITTLE BASTARD?"
"We don't know, yet." Jaga gestured toward Kitty who was still out cold on the ground. "What are we gonna do about her?"
"Leave her."
"She just saved you life, man."
"No, she didn't."
"She'll come in handy. Maybe she can talk Cael into turning back. She's good a persuasion."
"Why? I'm going to kill him anyway."
"He'll go to hell. Then Lucifer'll have him."
"Point. We'll take her."
"Ok, you get to carry her." Jaga headed for the door.
"Why me?"
"She saved your life."
"No, she didn't."

"What are you going to do to me?" Sim wanted to know as Cael drug her down the hall.
"Torture you, or kill you slowly. I haven't decided yet. Thought about rape, but you've slept with everybody and where's the sport in that?"
"Bastard!"
"Thank you." Sim growled at his response and kicked him in the shins. Didn't faze him much.
"Don't you feel any pain?!"
"Only in here, Simbunny." He hit his chest with his fist.
"HEY! ONLY HATCH CAN CALL ME THAT!"
"Hatch! That's it. I'll lock you in a room with him and deprive him of his medication! You're a genius." He kissed her but she hit him in the face.

"Sim!" Hatch stood up when she was thrown into his bedroom. The door latched behind her.
"Sit down. How much longer 'til your medication wears off?"
"About an hour I guess, why?" he thought a minute. "Oh…"
"Ok, we've got an hour to get the hell outta here." She went to the door but saw there was no lock on the inside.
"Remember? This room was designed to keep me in."
"You got out plenty of times. You can get out again."
"Sure, if I could remember how I did it."
"Damn."

"Cael!" Shini shouted dropping Kitty to the ground.
"You? How did you heal?" Caelestis growled.
"She did it." Jaga pointed down to Kit.
"I'm going to kick your ass!" Shinigami raged.
"Bring it on."
While Shini and Cael duked it out Kitty was starting to come to.
"I feel like I've been hit by lightening." She placed her hand gingerly on her forehead.
"You kinda were." Jaga answered her. "And you did heal a god."
"Shinigami is not a god." Kitty ridiculed. She looked over to see Shini and her brother fighting like rats over garbage.
"Hey!" she yelled out. "What do you think you're doing?" They ignored her. "I said…" she got on her feet and stood between them. They didn't notice her as they began a bull charge at each other. She threw her palms up at them and gave each a shot of energy. They both flew back a bit. "What do you think you are doing?"
"He tried to kill me!" Shini shouted.
"Yeah, so, I'm evil, that's what I do." Cael argued.
"You're not evil." Kitty glared at him. "You don't have the gall."
"What did you say?" he got closer to her face.
"I said, you don't have the gall." She hissed again.
"I'll show you gall!" He charged for her. Kitty simply stepped back making him smack into the wall.
"Why didn't I think of that?" Shini wondered.
"Because you're an idiot."
"Hey, you saved my life, remember?"
"No I didn't."
"AAAAGH!" They heard a yell from one of the rooms.
"Was that Sim?"
"Yeah, it was." Kitty shrugged.
"Oh well. We can get to her later. Let's tie Cael up."
"Good idea."
*to be continued*

When in debt

Kitty felt horrible about all this. He did bring it out on himself, but that didn't matter.
"You comfortable?" Kit asked making herself at ease on the floor.
"Do I look comfortable to you?" he snapped struggling at his straight jacket. He was hooked to the wall so he wouldn't get free. Kitty lightly pushed his shackled feet to make him swing a bit. She didn't say anything until he had completely stopped.
"Why did you quit?" she more sighed than asked.
"Quit what?"
"Fighting evil." Cael looked down at her while she leaned against the wall, not even looking up at him.
"You misunderstand," he replied. "I was never fighting evil, I was fighting good."
"You're not evil Cael." Kitty told him as she got up and walked out the door before he could respond.

"Why don't we just kill him?" Madi suggested at the dining hall table. Her and the gang (minus Kit) were having dinner.
"Death is your solution to everything isn't it?" Hatch poked at his meal with his fork. He didn't really feel like eating after what he tried to do to Sim only a few hours ago.
"Hey, always worked for me." She shrugged. "So why don't we?"
"Because if we did Cael would go to hell. Then Lucifer would have him for whatever it is he wants with him." Jaga explained his theory once again.
"That and Kitty would have a royal conniption." Lucas grinned. Kitty came in after he said that. She heaved a big sigh and took her usual seat next to him.
"Any luck?" Sim asked her.
"No…he's still convinced that he's evil." Kitty just stared at her plate a while and played with it with her fork. She had her head rested wearily on her palm.
"I hate to break this to you, Katherin." Madi was the only person who called her that. "But maybe his is evil." Kitty looked up at her with a glare that would stop a bullet in heat. She shot up from her chair and banged her fist on the table.
"HE IS NOT EVIL! DO YOU HEAR ME? HE'S NOT EVIL DAMN IT!" she spat.
"Denial isn't a good look for you." Madi declared coldly. Lucas grabbed Kit's arm and gently pulled her back down into the chair.
"Madison, don't talk to your mother like that." He warned her.
"You're not my father." She objected.
"Yes I am."
"You didn't raise me." All eyes went to Shinigami.
"What? I was evil? What did you expect me to do? Make her respectable?"
"Can we STOP talking about EVIL for one DAMN MINUTE? HUH?" Kitty shouted. She dropped her fork on her plate. "I'm not hungry…" she got up and left.
"Jerk." Sim whispered to Shinigami.
"You said you forgave me!"
"I lied." She growled and changed the subject. "You know, this is the point where the sympathetic husband goes in to comfort his dear loved one."
"I'm not her husband. We've been widowed for god knows how many times. I don't think that our marriage is valid anymore." He chewed on a piece of his chicken.
"That doesn't matter! You are Lucas. She is Kitty. You are both madly in love with each other!" Sim couldn't stand one more thing to go wrong today.
"I wouldn't say madly in love…" he began.
"Dude, if you don't go comfort her I will," Jaga replied. "The chick is hot." Lucas gave him a slight glare and left the table. The rest of them looked at Jaga. "What? It got him to go didn't it?"

When Lucas got to her Kitty was doing something she hadn't done it over fifty years. She was crying.
"You ok?" he asked leaning against the balcony railing with her. Still, after all this time, Kitty went up high when she got upset. Kitty sniffled a bit but didn't answer him. "C'mon, it's not that bad."
"I can't do anything…" she muttered, her voice jumping every chance it got.
"Sure you can, you can do lots of things."
"For Cael. I can't do anything for him…I feel weak and powerless."
"And you think no one has ever felt that way? Remember when we were fighting Shinigami? He turned into a dragon, Sim did her Ka-me-ha-me-ha deal, you shot a kii ball…I threw a rock…"
"Yeah…" Kitty let out a slight giggle at the memory.
"How about the time we landed on that world where the atmosphere was replaced with a marijuana substitute? Sim had to bail us both outta that one." She smiled at him to go on. "And the time where Shinigami possessed my body…we were all helpless then…but now he's on our side."
"Yeah…"
"See? You're just having a bit of bad luck with Cael. It'll change."
"Master Caelestis just escaped and is holding everyone in the dining hall captive!" one of the servants told them at the door. She seemed out of breath. "He's ushering them all out onto the courtyard and wants the two of you to meet him out there!"
"Of course I never said which way it would change."

They got to the courtyard with little trouble. The servant was right, he really had everyone hostage.
"Cael! What are you doing?" Kitty freaked.
"What does it look like? I'm being evil." He shrugged. He had a bazooka and was ready for the kill.
"Where did that come from?" Lucas asked him.
"I got it from Madi's closet." He answered. The entire group was bunched together so all he had to do was make one clean shot. Everyone looked at Madison.
"I like to be prepared." She answered bluntly.
"Cael! Stop it!" Kitty went up to him and attempted to grab his arm and stop him. Cael easily shrugged her off. "I said stop damn you!"
"Why the hell should I? Because my big bad sister said? Uh uh. I ain't goin for that."
"Then go for this…" she growled. Her voice was deep and demonic. She took her dragon hybrid form. Before he had a chance to retaliate Kitty had him down. Everyone would have been relieved if there wasn't just the one apparent problem. "Go to hell where you belong pond scum!"
"No! Mom! Don't kill him!" Hatch shouted. That didn't help much.
"You heard him, Kitty." Came another voice.
"Lex?" Kitty growled and turned her rampage on her nemesis.
"Lex the CONTROLLER! And if you kill him he'll go to hell. We wouldn't want that would we?" she said with her usual superior air.
"Why do you care?" Sim shouted.
"I owe you one, remember? And besides, if he goes to hell that's more competition for me." She gave the straight out answer. She then tossed some sort of amulet to the once again human Kitty. "Put that on him. It'll help him fight the evil."
"How do we know it's not some sort of controller device?" Lucas was skeptical.
"You don't." she said and was gone again.
"Damn it!" Madi declared putting her gun back down. "I wish she would do that. I had a clear shot of her head!" Kitty quickly put the necklace on her stunned brother. Then waited…

It was a few days before the amulet took effect, but Lex held true to her word…for once. Still everyone took extra special guard when Cael was in the room. Of course he didn't really blame them. In his mind this was bund to happen. It was just better sooner than later.
Fin/Owari



Doppelgangers-R-Us

Lucas never said much at dinnertime, he usually just ate quietly and listened (or ignored) what the annual bitching was about. This time though he was actually having a conversation with the rest of them. It was kinda one sided though.
"I mean come ON who had the idiotic idea of trying to grow flame retardant wood? It totally defeats the purpose." He stuffed a bit of fowl into his mouth. Hatch had made pheasant under glass.
"The whole point of it was to help prevent forest fires." Tsvantoor replied.
"That's what Smokey the Bear is for." He answered. "And what happens to the fuel we get from burning wood? It's screwing with nature man! You don't wanna f*** with nature..." He was about to go on after that, but Kitty stopped him.
"Lucas, did you just say f***?"
"Yeah, so?" he ripped some meat off the leg.
"You've only said that once in your entire life and it wasn't as an extra word in a sentence."
"So I'm expanding my vocabulary. Big deal."
"Guys," GelfHB came into the dining hall. "You might wanna look at this." Everyone fallowed him into the main room. On the TV a newscaster was telling about a recent story.
"In more breaking news, the spree killer has finally been seen. We will now show you a photo of this mysterious murderer…" the TV rang. Everyone's eyes traveled to Madi.
"That's not me, I SWEAR!" She exclaimed. They all looked at Kitty.
"Hey, I don't kill people I don't know." Kit threw her hands up.
"Then who is that?" Lucas wondered aloud. It looked just like Madison used to before she cut her hair off. The picture was gone from the TV almost as quickly as it had gone up.
"You may not want to go into public for a while, sis." Hatch informed her.
"You don't have to worry about that, she never goes into public anyway." Oniko teased for Mage.
"I do to!" Madi argued. "Just not often."
"Oh please," Kitty rolled her eyes. "You probably don't even know what season it is."
"Ha! There ARE no seasons in here!" Madi pointed out haughtily.
"Bitch has a point." Sim put in.
"I think it WAS you," Kitty stepped intimidatingly into Madi's face.
"Well, I think it was YOU!" Madison returned the threat.
"Ladies! Ladies! PLEASE!" Lucas lost his cool and attempted to break them apart violently. "THIS IS ENOUGH!"
"Shut-up you little prick!"…No one could tell which of the two had said it, but that was all it took.
"All right that's IT! I can't put up with this!" he hissed through his…fangs.
"Shit…" Sim muttered.
"I'm baaaaaaaaack!" Lucas shouted. "You thought you could suppress me? HA! I laugh at your mortal endeavors!" Kitty's rage went way down when she saw this.
"Lucas…now just calm yourself…" she reasoned.
"Call me Luke."
"But you hate that name…"
"I don't, he does."
"Great, the split personality has a relapse and even changes his name." Madi groaned.
"Me a split personality? Tell me, what do you do when you're asleep?" Luke went up to her.
"Nothing."
"You're asleep, how do you know?"
"Because I don't sleep."
"Good answer." He went up to Kit.
"And as for you, know this. You should sleep light, because I may wake up instead of him. If that happens, you'll never stir again."
"Is that a threat?" It seemed like Kitty was looking for any excuse to get into a fight today.
"Yes it was." He grinned, but not for long. SMACK
"Ow, gee, was that supposed to hurt?" He smirked licking the blood from his own lip.
"No, this was!"
"OUCH!" All the men cringed at once.
"Ohhhh, Jesus Kitty, what did you do that for?" Lucas asked in a high voice.
"Lucas! I'm so sorry! He must have gone just before…I'm SO sorry!" She helped him to his feet.
"Who?"
"Luke."
"Luke? You mean he?…oh shit."
"Well, that was a nice scene. It distracted us just enough so we would miss the part of the news saying where the killer should be." Jaga stated.
"How convenient." Sim replied.
"I gotta go to the jon." Madi growled leaving the room.
"Well that was eventful." Kitty crossed her arms. "I'm starved, let's go eat."
"I could really go for a nice rare steak right now." Lucas replied. Everyone stared at him a moment. "Just kidding." He was the last one to leave the room when he breathed. "I wish."
Fin



Problems? What problems?

"Lucas." Oniko replied with Mage behind her. "We need to talk." Mage put his arm around his Granpa's shoulder and lead him to his room. "I've noticed you have a…problem."
"No shit." Lucas raised an eyebrow. Mage gestured that he take a seat. He did.
"And I'm not the only one…do I HAVE to do this?" Oniko whined to Mage. He gave her a 'go on' look. She heaved a big sigh and continued as if she were reading it from a book. "You seem to have a problem with your anger. Whenever you get made you change into a vampire and take on a personality that is completely contrast to your own. A split personality…what am I saying Marten?" He gave her the 'just go' look again. "A split personality that kills people, and sleeps with different women…I don't wanna DO THIS!" she whined again. Mage seemed like he was saying something else to her. "Fine! Go ahead!" she snapped. He looked a bit uneasy, but made some strange gesture with his hands and zonked out.
"Mage?" Lucas poked him.
"I'm over here." Oniko replied.
"Holy shit…did you just…"
"Yeah, as I was saying, you've got a problem…" Lucas interrupted him.
"Whoa! You swapped bodies! Where's Oniko? Is she in there?" He was filled with questions.
"Yes. In my body. No." he answered quickly. "Anyway I…"
"Do you guys do this often?" Lucas intervened again.
"No…may I finish?"
"Do you feel her up while you're in there? If I were a woman I'd be feeling myself all day."
"No…"Mage looked at him disgusted. "You're Luke aren't you?"
"Yep."
"Figures. And you were a woman once."
"Yeah, but the damn mortal wouldn't let me do anything."
"And we are all thankful for that."
"I almost got to when he got drunk, but he passed out. Only had like two…"
"Luke, will you please listen to me?"
"No."
"Fine. If you want listen to me I'll just have to get Gelf to talk to you." Mage snapped his fingers and Oniko's face grew vacant. She was back. Mage stood up and fallowed his love out. Luke left too.

"Is it just me, or is everyone taking turns goin evil here?" Madi folded her arms across her chest and leaned against the wall.
"I wouldn't call it evil," Hatch poured some seasonings into a large vat and began to stir. "Eccentric maybe."
"Eccentric?"
"Yeah, none of them tried to kill anyone."
"Cael did."
"Yeah, but that was Shini. He doesn't count."
"Well apparently he does count since Katherin healed him."
"Mom's eccentric too." Hatch shrugged. "Taste this." He pulled the large wooden stirring spoon from the tomato sauce and handed it to Madi.
"You don't let anyone taste you cuisines…" She raised an eyebrow.
"I do too." He argued lightly, not even looking at her.
"When it's done."
"Will you just taste the sauce?" his voice rose a bit. He had his hands resting on the countertop; his arms were stiff making his back arch. Hatch still seemed to refuse to look at his sister. That's when her theories of a look-alike imposter in the palace came to a sudden halt. She realized her "theories" had turned into fact.
"Ok, who are you?" Madi put the spoon down and fingered her pistol.
"I'm me, who do you think I am?" he answered her.
"I think your not who you say you are." She whipped the gun out and aimed. The target whipped around, Madison was stunned for a while as she gazed back at her own face. The rest of the body morphed into an exact copy except for her right eye. It was a solid golden orange. In Madi's moment of amazement she let her guard down slightly. The replica's leg rose and she whipped it to the side knocking the gun away, and, aiming higher but still in the same movement, whisked it into her chin. Madi2 then ran to the window. Madison collected herself just quick enough to see the Xerox jump. She gushed to the pane just quick enough to see her doppelganger drop gracefully down five stories and land neatly on her feet. She ran from the courtyard without even a limp.
"Whoa…" Madi replied with a bit of envy.
"Hey Madi," Hatch greeted from behind her. He went back to his cooking. "When did you get here?"
"When did I…Where were you?"
"I had to take my medication, it's ten o'clock."
"C'mon we need to get everyone together." She violently snatched him by the arm and proceeded to drag him away.
"But my noodles…" he complained. "We all get together for dinner, let's just do it then." Madi stopped.
"Fine." She sighed.

"So you're saying there's a thing running around impersonating us?" Hatch was hearing the story for the first time.
"And doing a damn good job of it too. There's no telling how long they've been here. They could be eating with us right now." Everyone looked around except Sim, Kit, and Lucas; they continued to eat.
"What?" Sim asked when she noticed the stares. Kitty just slurped up a noodle.
"Crap like this happens all the time and yet everyone manages to be surprised every time." Lucas swallowed his food.
"What did you put in the sauce?" Oniko noticed. "It tastes different." Madison's eyes widened.
*to be continued*

Ok, so maybe there's a small problem…

"Everybody stop eating!" Madi demanded. "It could be poisoned!" That grabbed their attention. Half the diners spit the food back onto the plate. Kitty kept eating, which was no surprise really.
"How can it be poisoned? Dad, Tsvan, and I invented a drug detector we put in the door way. A siren would have gone off." Hatch folded his arms in an offended manner.
"That's true." Tsvantoor put in. "It should detect all drugs."
"Well, not all drugs." Lucas added. "We fixed it so the thing would go off for Hatch's Medi…cation, oh shit."
"Quick man!" Sim grabbed Hatch's collar. "What does it do!" Mage passed out causing some sauce to splatter when face banged onto the plate.
"It's a sedative," Hatch answered.
"That's just great…" Lucas yawned.
"I think it's about time you went to sleep." Luke said through the same mouth. "Staying up all night working when we could be doing somehting constuctive like weeding out the population, or enjoying the company of a total stranger and killing them…"
"Shut-up." Lucas growled cutting him off.

It wasn't too long until Kitty was the only one left with their eyes open. Instead of putting her to sleep the sedative just made her vision blur a bit. Nothing seroius, but still she decided to play dead and listen foor movement in the room.
At first it was so quiet she almost went to sleep just waiting, then there was the shuffle of feet coming towards her. She remained still until she could feel a body hovering over her. Kit's arm shot up and caught the person by the throat. Kitty quickly stood and opened her eyes. She still couldn't see, but she could feel the figure squirming in her grasp.
"Whoa, Kit, your eyes are red." Of course it was Sim's brother. The only one who didn't have sauce on their pasta, he must have been the perp Madi was talking about.
"Really?" she cocked her head and tried to look a mad as she could. "I hadn't noticed."
"Let him go." madi defended placing a cold metal nozle on her mother's temple. Kit's hand jerked open letting him slip to the ground. "Now take your real form." she comanded.
"I'm in it." Kit answered with her handss raised.
"I don't think she's…" Jaga began.
"Don't play dumb with me, I know my mother wouldn't murder in masses. She'd kill them one by one."
"Madi," she cooed. "You called me your mother." Kitty grasped her little girl in a hug.
"I think it's an effect of the tranquelizer."
"I've got your perminent tranquelizer right here." Madison took the safety off. Kitty let go and backed away, once again putting her hands into the air. "Much better."
"Are all your kids as f***ed up as you?" Jaga asked Kit.
"It's not my fault," Kitty replied. "I didn't raise any of them."
"Hey!" Hatch declared drowsily. "You raised me." Who else was actaully awake?
"Your not mine." Kit siad as if it were obvious.
"He's not?" Madi dropped her weapon.
"I was adopted." Kitty didn't have all her vision, but she knew Hatchet was the one who said that.
"You're not my brother?"
"Of course I am…I'm just your great nephew too…"
"Nephew…how…what…why wasn't I informed of this!" Madison raged.
"You sure you didn't eat the sauce?" Jaga asked.
"Yes!" she turned to both Hatch and Kitty. "Now answer me!"
"I thought you knew," Kitty answered. "The way everybody talks around here I thought you'de figure it out by now." she shrugged.
"Well I didn't!" Madi made a circle keeping her hands on her head as she said her next line. "I have to be told this NOW! OF ALL TIMES!"
"You think everybody'll be ok?" Hatch asked checking the pulse of one of the arms before letting it drop to the table.
"Don't you DARE change the subject!" the blond scrapped her gun from he floor anf made three shots in the air.
"Holy shite! You didn't just kill someone did you?!" Kit's voice shook. She swallowed and waited for her answer.
"No."
"Whew, thank you." Kit wiped her brow.
"I don't see what's stopping me though…"
"The ex part of exassassin?" Jaga nervously put in.
"Shut-up!" Madi aimed at him. Kit's vision finally cleared and she could see the profile of a wild eyed blonde with her arm out stretched keeping a silver desert eagle only inches from Jaga's sweaty nose.
"Madsion, stop it!" Kit comanded.
"Make me," she growled.
"If you say so." She shrugged again and with top speed she grabbed ehr daughter's arm twisting it back. The echo of metal clacking on marble floor could be heard all over the palace.
"You relly need to learn to obey your mother." Jaga picked it up.
"She's not my mother." Madi's left eyes turned a solid golden-orange.
"Who are you?" Kitty asked the prisoner. "Where's my Madi?" The clone said nothing. "Well?" The xerox's fist molded into a sharp blade and she swung her arm to cut off Kit's head. BANG Just as her arm went out it was flug back. Blood oozed from the carefluuy placed bullet. Still saying nothing her body shimmered into nothingness. She was gone.
"How long were you there?" Jaga asked. No one was really baffled at the escape.
"At the word 'sedative'. When I saw myself at the table all ready I decided to lay low.
"Why didn't you do something sooner?"
"I was enjoying the show." Madi shrugged.
"Figures." he muttered.
"You're welcome." Madison said in Kit's ear; smacking her hand on her shoulder.
"For what?"
"I did just save your life."
"Why does everyone keep saying that? I can't dies damn it! You're not saving me!" Meanwhile as the descussion was taking place Hatch had been checking everyone's pulse.
"When they wake up, I'm going to be blamed for poisoning them I just know it. The maniac is always the one blamed!"
"I thought that was Sim?" Kitty replied.
"Same difference." Jaga filled in.
"I wont be able to cook anymore. I'll have to freeload lik the rest of you." he looked up at the concoius ones. "Or is that what you want?"
"Greeeeaaaaat," Jaga rolled his eyes. "Now flower boy is getting paraniod."
"Hang on…doesn't he keep his medication with him all the time?" Kitty asked Madison.
"Yeah…"
"then for the xerox to put it in the sauce she would have had to have it…"
"But he was taking it when…craaaaap." Madi whined.
"Little help here guys?" jaga was trying to keep Hatch in the room. He had the out-cold Sim tucked under his arm like a foot ball. "Why do they always try and take my sister?"
"She probably has that dark quality that badguys and insane people find attractive." Madison answered him grasping the fighting Htach's arm.
"Really? I figured it was because she was small and easy to carry." Kitty got an idea as she said that. "Quick! Distact him!"
"Easy for you to…oof!" Jaga was hit when Hatch began using Sim as a weapon. Madi was hitting every nerve she knew, but his adrenaline was pumping too fast. Finally she grapped his wrist making his and open and Sim flew across the room. She landed into…herself.
"Hey!" hatch complained. "No fair! Now there's two of you!" The Sim's slowly started to come to. Kitty did her best to copy the real Sim's actions.
"Ouch," they said together. "Why is my body sore?…Hey!" They looked at eachother. "Stop copying me!" Hatch looked boggled for a moment, shrugged, and took the both.
"So much for that idea," Kit replied quietly.
"Let me go!" Sim demanded beating on him. This time Madi and Jaga just let him go. Madi took the gun identical to hers away from Jaga.
"You know, I think Kitty was right," Jaga leaned against the doorway. "Look at him go." That's when the others started coming to.
"Maybe we should fet outta here, before the hang-overs kick in?" Madi suggested.
"Good idea. Shall we?" Jaga politly offered his arm. Madsion just brushed past him. "Guess not."

Sim and kit stood over Hatch's unconcius body.
"I can't belive you hit your own kid." Sim folded her arms and shook her head.
"I'm sorry, but when he started babbling about a threesome I freaked."
"Really? I thoight a slut like you would enjoy that kinda thing." she snorted.
"For sanity's sake! I hit on Shinigami over nineteen years ago!"
"Eighteen."
"Whatever! Just let it GO lady!…oh…wait, I forgot, bitch midgets hold grudges to the grave."
"Hey! I'm not a midget!" Sim flared getting threataningly close.
"You keep telling yourself that." kitty returned the heated glare. She still had Sim's form so they were eye to eye. "And who are you calling me a SLUT!"
"I've known you for a long time…"
"And I thought it was out of experiance."
"Ok! That's it! your mine schiziod!"
"Bring…it…on." Kitty growled.
They were on the brink of battle when Hatch began to wake up. He moaned and pushed himslef off the ground shakedly.
"Crap," Kit noticed, letting her gurad down. Sim got in a good hard punch. It knocked Kitty back and red gushed from her busted mouth.
"Whoa…" Sim muttered wiping the victim's blood from her fist. "I feel so much better now." She grinned.
"Koodos to you," Kitty mustered through her wound. By now Hatch was fully erect. Kitty quickly dropped her illusionary form. She and Sim watched Htachet wobble about for a minute holding his head. They let him speak first.
"Will everyone stop spinning already?" he whined. He stood perfectly still and blinked a few times. "Thank you." He looked at his mom and her puffed up lip. "Did I do that?"
"No." Kitty answered him bluntly.
"Good…SIMBUNNY!" he chirped and rushed up to hug her.
"Urg," she gasped then notied something. "Hey this is the first time he's hugged me and not had a…" she was stopped by Kit's 'say it and die' gaze. "Are you sane?" she asked Hatch quickly to change the subject.
"Um…" he had to back up and think about this one. "Ooo, butterfly." he then started to chase the invisbile insect.
"Darn, and for a while there I thought I had knocked to sense into him."
"Well, he's not trying to sleep with me That's progress."
Hell yes." Kitty agreed.
Fin

Sacrifices

"According the Earthen Mythology, the sirens sang so marvelously that it drove sailors to their deaths by making them sail their ships to them…" Ms. Ellen went on. Cael examined the charm on his necklace. Lex had promised this pewter entangled stone would absorb most of the evil that his body seemed to attract. The jewel was once a pure blue, but each day it grew closer to the other side of the spectrum. Countless times he wondered what would happen if it finally turned red, or if it absorbed as much evil as it could…or both. "Caelestis," Ms. Ellen was leaning on her desk peering at him. "Answer my question."
"Uh…" he quickly tucked the necklace back in his shirt.
"In Earthen Mythology, which deity killed his father and took his place as king of the gods?" she replied with a sigh and a roll of the eyes. That's when a note ws gently tucked into his hand. Leslie had brushed past and was now sharpening her already pointy pencil. The word 'Zues' was scribbled on the top.
"Uh…Zeus?"
"Correct." Ms Ellen turned the board again and rote the name. "Zeus proclaimed himself king while…" Her voice started to muffle as he unfolded the note. It was written in loopy cursive that he identified as Leslie's. It read: